IV - Flared Ribs

Flared Ribs

Last month, my brother, Vin, the one who lives on Vancouver Island, and I spoke on the phone about the impact of our childhoods on our present day lives.

Finally.

For the longest time, even when I was a teenager, if I ever tried to talk about the negative impacts of being Mennonite I’d get the same response from members of my family, “They did the best that they knew how.”

End of story.

No discussion necessary.

So when my mother saw me, a girl of 15 in front of the mirror curling my hair in a Farrah Fawcette flip for school and said, “Vanity, vanity!” there was no one I could turn to express how humiliated and shameful I felt.

***

“I have flared ribs,” Vin says on the phone. We don’t talk so much these days but when we do we are discussing the past.

“Oh I have a bit of that too.” I say, as I examine my ribs for what feels like the first time.

“So I googled it.”

“Ok.”

“It turns out it’s a real thing,” he says. “Apparently it happens, over time when someone does not fully exhale and is in a constant state of stress and it causes the bottom ribs to flare. So,” he continues, “my therapist asked why I thought I wasn’t breathing as a kid and I tell him, to make myself small, really small.”

“Oh, Vin, I can so relate.” as I flip my hair back and enjoy the feel of it down my back. “No need for staying small anymore!” And we both take a big deep breath together.

*https://balancemotion.com/rib-flare-why-it-sucks-and-why-you-should-care/